Inspector Ike Can’t Salvage Inspector Ike

Imagine a drama class with a bunch of awkward, cringe adults who think all their jokes are funny. You know the type – the kids from high school drama who, twenty years later, are still seeking validation. Now imagine that they have enough money for a feature film.

I present to you the biggest letdown of the year: Inspector Ike. It’s not even from 2022, but I don’t care – I just watched it, and now I need to shit on it.

I had high hopes based on the premise. It was, supposedly, a spoof of 70s detective dramas, full of wacky hijinks, tongue-in-cheek comedy, but ultimately, reverence for what made the genre iconic.

Instead, it’s 80 minutes of awkward-ass adults making stupid jokes and over-acting. I understand that the over-acting is a parody of the melodrama inherent to 1970s crime dramas. But it’s not. Funny. At. All. I was stunned at how unhumorous the whole affair was. With the notable exception of… Inspector Ike himself.

Ike is played phenomenally by Ikechukwu Ufomadu. If everybody else is an awkward drama student, he’s the drama teacher. He’s the Xanax to their obnoxious ADHD-fueled antics. His comedic timing is on-point, his demeanor is pleasantly low-key and carefree, and his charm is undeniable.

Shockingly for this production, his line delivery actually fits what I was expecting from the premise – over-the-top yet underplayed, the comedic sweet spot we need but don’t deserve. He’s actually enjoyable to watch, unlike EVERYONE ELSE IN THE MOVIE.

This woman was probably the only other halfway decent actor. Maybe. Not gonna lie, I tuned out everyone who wasn’t Ike.

Hands-down best scene, by a mile, is when Ike teaches you how to make chili. In the middle of the story. Because why not. It was like watching a black Bob Ross. Every time he was onscreen, I was filled with joy.

Regrettably, every time he was offscreen filled me with depression. I literally just muted the movie whenever he wasn’t in a scene, which, sad to say, was pretty often. Ikechukwu – you deserve a better supporting cast for your script. Oh yeah, apparently he co-wrote it, which makes me feel even worse about how badly it all turned out… RIP.

Rating: 3.1 / 10

God bless this man